Monday, May 4, 2015

Monday - Persuasive Writing

Tonight you'll get the opportunity to work on persuasive writing.

Topic: Soccer players should wear headgear during games.

Paragraph #1
  • Attractive Opener: - 2 -3 sentences: start with a startling fact, quote, etc. 
  • Thesis statement: I believe that...(state your opinion on one issue)
  • Reasons: 2 reasons

Paragraph #2
  • Topic Sentence for Reasons #1
  • Example(s)/Evidence to support Reason #1- include, facts, data, examples that aren't common knowledge
  • Concluding Sentence

Paragraph #3
  • Topic Sentence for Reason #2
  • Example(s)/Evidence to support Reason #2 - include, facts, data, examples that aren't common knowledge
  • Concluding Sentence
Paragraph #4
  • Restate your thesis in a slightly different way. Sum up main points. 
  • Don't bring up new evidence or arguments
  • Call to action
Cite your evidence. 

16 comments:

  1. Soccer is the most popular team sport in the world. Millions of people play it and billions of people watch it. I believe that soccer players of all ages should wear helmets during games. One reason this is important is this is a game where players are around goal posts. Another reason is because the ball often hits the head.

    Goal posts can be dangerous in two ways. One thing that can happen is an unsecure post can fall over by the wind or player impact and hurt someone. Another danger is when a player knocks into it. If soccer players wore helmets then their heads would be protected if something like this happens.

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  2. Soccer Players Should Wear Headgear During Games

    Soccer is such a fun sport; it’s not as violent as other sports like football. It’s a fun supporting game, but the thing is, that soccer isn’t that friendly sometimes, yes it’s not as violent as football, but it falls right beneath it, why? Well, because of your head protection, you might think, hey, there is no head interaction in soccer, but really there is, and it’s called heading the ball. This will show you why children should wear head protection in soccer!

    Heading the ball can cause problems, let me explain. First, changes can occur in your head if you head ball to many times. If you head ball up to eight hundred eighty five times a year changes may start to occur in you body, but one thousand eight hundred head balls a year could be serious, so watch out!

    Another reason why children should wear headgear for soccer is because of specific mistakes a child may make. Some examples may include getting hit in the head with the ball, knocking on another player’s head, or just simply tripping, there are many reasons why children should wear headgear while playing soccer. Every little thing can lead up to something huge in the future, this mostly concludes fainting.

    I hope I convinced you that headgear can be extremely important for young soccer players, especially because it effects them the most, headgear can finish many signs of danger. So to stay safe during soccer this is the thing to do!

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  3. Soccer players have to wear headgear during all games in professional soccer. In fact, they can’t even play on the team without headgear. It’s know that when a player does a header without a helmet, that can cause a lot of damage because of the impact. Kids don’t have the nerve to cover their head from a large impact so they have worse damage.

    Headers are one of a billion common soccer moves during games. They are also used during scrimmages, but not in practice. Heading a ball can cause a concussion, says Dr. Robert Cantu (www.pbs.org). A concussion changes the way your brain functions. If you manage to hit the ball hard enough with your head, you can get a concussion. If that happened many times, it can cause permanent brain damage. (www.webmd.com)

    There isn’t a lot of proof about the connection between soccer headers and amount of brain damage, but they do know that people who played years of soccer have changes in the structure of their brains. Kids also don’t have protection on their nerves that adults have, known as myelinated (www.pbs.org), so, kid's nerve connections can actually be broken. If 10-12 year olds have damage, they can actually prevent their adult brains from developing to it's maximum ability.

    I think helmets are a valuable tool for soccer, just like football. Any time there’s impact on the brain, a helmet should be put on. Why should people riding bikes and skateboards wear helmets and not soccer players? The proof is in all of the people who played soccer for years and show that their brain have damage. It’s time to get your helmet today.

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    Replies
    1. Nice response! Very thought through!

      Delete
  4. Close your eyes and imagine this. You are a soccer goalie and you are standing in the middle of a goal. You have no headgear on and a ball is shooting at you and is about to hit you square in the face. You would be seriously damaged. This is why I believe that wearing headgear is be important in soccer.

    Headers, tripping, slipping and running into people are all way you can be seriously damaged. Wearing headgear can important because these injuries could affect your body for a very long time.

    Also, mistakes can be made without headgear. As I have stated earlier, you can get seriously damaged and injured. In my opinion, I believe that wearing headgear is extremely important.

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  5. Did you know that that female soccer players have a higher risk of getting a head injury? But males are also at risk of getting concussions. I believe that soccer players should wear headgear during games because players might be more competitive during games. This would make it easier for them to prevent head injuries or concussions. In addition to this, studies have shown permanent brain abnormalities with youth soccer players and soccer players in general.

    Since players are more competitive when they are playing games (versus practice), they should wear protective headgear. Dr. Goldberg, a physiology consultant, says that soccer players are more competitive with other teams then they are with their own teammates. During practices the players and coaches are not seeing many head injuries, so they might underestimate how many people could get hurt during the actual games. Since they are more competitive during games with another team’s players, they can be more aggressive and rough. As you can see, headgear can help soccer players during soccer games, preventing possible head injuries.

    Another reason why soccer players should wear headgear is because they can do permanent damage to their brains. One study showed permanent brain abnormalities for soccer players who did 885 headers a year or more. Young kids, when they are playing soccer, can also have permanent damage to their brains because they are still developing. An expert on youth concussions, Dr. Robert Cantu believes that when kids have collisions or fall, they have a higher chance of getting a head injury. Some people may think that the head injuries in soccer can be slight, but some of them can have a big impact on the brain, making it even more important to wear headgear during the games.
    Since players are more competitive during games and since there is a high chance soccer players can get permanent head damage, I think headgear should be worn during soccer games. Soccer players may not realize how competitive they can be out on the field until they see the faces of the crowd and the teams. The seriousness of the possible damage you can face is hard to believe. However, you can avoid getting a bad head injury by wearing some headgear. It is important for you to go and spread the word to your schools. Let your soccer team know these facts so they can wear their headgear next time they play a game.

    Evidence
    https://www.competitivedge.com/catalog/soccer
    http://www.pbs.org/newshour/updates/qa-soccer-players-wear-helmets-top-neurosurgeon-weighs-concussion-risks/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Very detailed Bootsy! Nice facts about head injuries, and brain damage!

      Delete
  6. We all know the basic sports: there are swimming and running, which are individual sports, basketball, where once you have the ball, you pretty much win the game, football, which is wrestling while flinging a ball yards into the air, and soccer. Soccer is a team sport, is challenging for both sides, and isn't dangerous. If soccer isn't dangerous, why do some people believe that soccer players should wear headgear? I believe that soccer players shouldn't wear headgear because the game is safe and has penalties for fouling, and headgear can make you run slower.

    Soccer players shouldn't wear headgear because the game is safe. In the rules of soccer (according to http://www.syossetsoccer.org/home/683808.html), players aren't aloud to kick, trip, shove, push, tackle, or hold any players. If any player does these action deliberately, the other team gets a free kick. Also, a team gets a free kick if one of their team members gets injured. For example, on my soccer team, Gigi (another Gigi who is much better at soccer than me) once was trying to shot the ball, but it hit a girls face. She had to be let out and their team got a free kick. As you can see, soccer is a safe game, so it shouldn't require headgear.

    Also, soccer players shouldn't have to wear headgear because it can slow them down while running. If a "soccer helmet" would be the same as a football helmet, it would weigh 3-5 pounds! Imagine having a breakaway and trying to run at top speed with a 5 pound weight on your head! It would definitely slow down the pace of the game. In conclusion, if soccer players had to wear helmets, they would run much slower.

    As you can see, soccer players shouldn't have to wear headgear. Not only are soccer games safe, but also headgear would make a soccer player slower! As soccer players, we should all have fun during the game and stay safe, but headgear isn't required!

    Bibliography:
    http://www.syossetsoccer.org/home/683808.html

    http://blog.sportsunlimitedinc.com/how-much-does-a-football-helmet-weigh/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Great job Double G! Nice persuasive writing!!!!!

      Delete
  7. I believe that headgear should not be worn during soccer games. Although soft helmets can protect your head, they do not stop concussions. Also, by wearing one you can feel more safe, and do more head on collisions during a game.

    Soft helmets only prevent lacerations, fractures, and bleeding, not concussion or brain damage. The American Medical Society for Sports Medicine position statement on concussion in sports states this. They have studied the effect of wearing soft helmut.

    Wearing a helmet makes your kids feel more safe. They can go after more head on collisions thinking that the helmet will protect them against brain damage. Togey Bryant, mother of 3, stated that her daughter, who has had a head injury before, takes more chances while wearing the helmet than with it off.

    In conclusion, soft helmets should not be worn during soccer games. They only protect against minor injuries, not concussions. Also, wearing headgear during a game gives you a false sense of security. Kids may take more chances.

    http://www.today.com/parents/helmets-soccer-why-some-parents-are-saying-no-thanks-8C11359522

    ReplyDelete
  8. Should players wear headgears or not?

    Soccer is an amazing sport played and enjoyed by many people all over the world. Do you now that more than 240 million people around the world play soccer regularly according to the Federation Internationale de Football Association (FIFA). Soccer is a really fun game but you sometimes have to be careful because if you hurt yourself you may cause some permanent damage to your body.


    I think soccer players should wear headgears because even if you're a really good soccer player there is always a possibility you could be hit in the head and cause some serious damage to your brain. A headgear is also important because if the soccer ball is heading towards you and you don’t have any protection from the ball it can really hurt your face really badly. And if you hit your head really hard you can sometimes get a concussion.


    So in conclusion I think soccer players should wear headgears for their safety so they can enjoy the sport that is loved by millions of people all over the world. If you don’t want to wear a headgear then answer this, would you rather wear a headgear and keep playing soccer, or not wear one and risk the chance of being hit in the head and have to stop playing the game for a little while.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Soccer Injuries:
    Women's soccer actually has the most concussions out of all sports! Well, it is, and soccer players get seriously injured because of headers. Especially when competing for a header with someone else. You could hit your head with the other player, or fall on the ground headfirst. There are many possible bad scenarios leading to headers.


    Heading the ball correctly, takes skill and accuracy. You have to have your body parts in the right positions in order to provide a nice header. Also, protecting you from another player. When jumping, your hips have to be slightly extended, and knees flexed. The contact with the player and ball should be made at the top of the jump in order to put pressure on the ball. Headgear would make it less stressed about doing it, because things can go wrong very easily.


    When heading the ball, the ball should be the proper size for the age level, to make sure that the impact isn't too rough. Your head also has to be prepared, because then your head is a larger mass than the ball. But, if your head is unprepared, then the ball can cause injuries to your head, and lead to a head injury. So, when doing headers, you need to have everything ready, in order to produce a well done header.

    Can kicking the ball lead to concussions? No, it can't, because the ball would have to be going 100 mph. which is way above what anyone can achieve. But, it can lead to head injuries usually if a player is unprepared. Another statement is that goalies punts can also lead to head injuries on the side of the head, if there is an unprepared player out there. So, you definitely need to be ready for anything.

    Bibliography: http://www.active.com/articles/is-headgear-necessary-for-soccer-players


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  10. Sure people get hurt when playing soccer but mostly when the go chase for the ball and do header. This does not mean that they should wear headgear. Even when kids get hurt while playing soccer it does not happen often. I believe that kids of any age do not need to be required to wear headgear.

    Soccer has been going on for a long time without headgear and I don't see the point of adding it on now. The most common time when people get head injuries is when a goalie tries to stop a ball hurling towards them. The header it and it can lead to head injuries. But getting a concussion is uncommon.

    Wearing headgear also can cause the soccer players to slow down as their running. Soccer has been known as a fast sport running around a field but when you have headgear on you can sow down. When wearing a helmet your head sometimes sinks toward the ground and when running around you can crash into someone and get your your limbs damaged.

    Even if their are benefits to not wearing headgear, there are also disadvantages. People should not be forced to wear headgear if it is not that necessary.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Soccer is a great sport until it gets to head injuries the most common injury on the field. The person who need it the most is the goalie because when they dive for a ball they might hit their heads on the goalpost. Also the players need it to prevent concussions from headers or hitting other player's head.

    For instants Alex Martin tried to prevent a goal by slide tackling the ball, when he hit the goal post by sliding further than the post and hit his head. Alex Martin got brain damage and a concussion from that hard hit on his head.

    For instants when Messi jumped up to header the ball and Ronaldo jumped up they both hit each others head. and both fell to the floor and later they got big head bumps and concussions.

    ReplyDelete